Anger is normal, but it can also be a dangerous and destructive force when it’s out of control.

Keep yourself in balance when your blood is boiling with these tips:

Breathe. Stop what you’re doing, or what you’re about to say, and take three deep breaths to calm yourself. It’s a little like the old “Count to 10” advice. The pause, and the oxygen, will help you relax.

 

Gain perspective. Examine the situation a little. Will it make a difference next year, or even tomorrow? What’s the worst thing that might happen because of the situation that’s making you enraged? Is the other person really making you angry on purpose, or is it a misunderstanding? Taking a mental step back can soothe your emotions.

Exercise. Physical activity can release built-up tension that contributes to frustration and anger. Take a walk, stretch your muscles. If possible, get away from the situation for a while: Go to the gym, lift some weights, shoot some baskets, etc.

Don’t attack. Losing control and yelling at people won’t really make you feel better, and probably won’t solve the problem. If you must confront the other person, wait until you’ve calmed down enough to explain yourself rationally.

Track your anger. Learn what makes you angry so you can proactively counter it. Keep a journal and monitor what sets you off. Certain people or situations may exacerbate feelings of insecurity or low self-esteem. The more you understand your own mental processes, the better prepared you’ll be to deal with your emotions.